Japanese PHP script - remove Japanese replace w/ English

I need this script written by a Japanese programmer cleaned up for English. The comments and some of the other parts of the code are written in Japanese. Using an online translator doesn't clean it up enough or clearly explain what some of the functions are... This is a Google Analytics script that sends Google Analytics data to your cell phone. Found here: [login to view URL] Download Script Here: [login to view URL] I prefer someone who is Japanese that can translate this script properly, save it and send it back. Thanks You Budget $30